Overcoming the Jitters When Meeting an Elected Official (or Staff)
It’s understandable — you’re meeting a staffer or an official in the halls of power, and you’re nervous. This is a big deal, after all, and you want to present yourself as best as you can.
All of us — ALL of us — have a little “stage fright” when we’re meeting someone new. (Anyone who says otherwise is either lying — or they have the greatest coping mechanisms ever gifted to a human.) It’s normal, even in the most casual settings. Those jitters can be amped up when you’re speaking to someone in power.
But remember:
The person you’re talking to is another human being. They have thoughts, fears, and insecurities just like you do.
You probably have some common ground with the person you’re speaking with, especially if you’re both from the same state (as we outlined here).
Elected officials (and their staffers’ jobs) depend on votes, yours included. They’ve met nervous people before. They know you’re not a pro at lobbying. They’re not going to want to embarrass you or make you feel unwelcome, even if they disagree with your point of view.
Want a buddy?
So often it’s easier to do when you’re not alone. Beforehand, feel free to reach out to us via email if you’re coming alone and would like to be paired with someone when you arrive. If you’re just showing up blind, there’s always someone at FLARE (Union Station) that can greet, chat with you, and help with a friendly face. If you want to be part of a larger group, consider coordinating one of your days with a larger event heading to congress throughout the month!
Practical Tips
Still jumpy? Try these strategies as you’re waiting to speak with someone:
Deep breaths can be a wonder. A few mindful inhales and exhales are great.
Go easy on the caffeine before the meeting. Your adrenaline is already overcompensating.
Visualize a pleasant place or sensation, like a beach or a mountain breeze. Think about a pet for a moment.
Keep some water handy if you can. A quick sip is helpful.
Lean into the “3-3-3” technique, an exercise that can help folks with social anxiety ground themselves:
Look around the room and name three things to yourself: chair, desk, portrait. Take special notice of an unusual color or pattern, and note it.
Name three sounds you hear: think to yourself about that sense — are you hearing footsteps, a phone ringing, distant conversations? Focus on one.
Move three parts of your body: Choose three and move them one by one, intentionally. Take a breath and feel your chest rise. Tap one foot gently. Smile.
Getting Prepared
Are you travelling with someone who’s done this before? Feel free to pick their brains! Citizen activists and lobbyists are generous folk who love to share.
It’s completely fine to practice speaking to a mirror (if it doesn’t make you more nervous, that is). Everyone’s different, of course, but most folks shouldn’t try to memorize a script beforehand, just a few points or two, perhaps including:
What you might have in common with the person you’re speaking with,
What your specific concern is,
How it affects you or your family personally, if you have an example,
What action you’d like to see (Example: “I’d really encourage you to speak out against the tactics of ICE.”).
Do you need to take a few notes with you on some small index cards or a pocket notebook? Don’t worry about it, just do it.
And finally, when you start talking, don’t rush. Don’t feel like you have to use big words to impress anyone. Heck, don’t try to impress them at all — the fact that you, a citizen and constituent, made this effort and expended your own resources is both impressive and something that people back home will be astonished and proud that you tried.